question
May 10, 2013 by tdomf_25e5a
Filed under Integrations
how do i learn to play with no job. i want to play and to grow by leaps and bounds. its very hard with no job.
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Hi there,
I feel really honoured to be invited to the Neothink Society.
I’ve got a long story to tell.
I come from Hong Kong, so English isn’t my first language, but I’ve understood the Heirloom Packages pretty well.
I particularly like the part on Friday-Night Essences – it’s so right to be doing what one loves to do and be successful in it.
My trouble is identifying my true FNE. I’ve been studying Math all my life, and am currently a Math PhD student about to finish up.
But throughout my life I’ve never been able to identify interesting projects to work on myself – it feels like I always need suggestions from someone else (i.e. external guidance).
This makes me feel sad and depressed at times – I know you guys have invested lots of time and energy in me, but I haven’t progressed that much. It’s like I understand the concepts, but can never apply them to my life. Plus I’ve missed a lot of Neothink meetings – I always feel I can’t find time for these meetings, in fact time for anything!
So I hope you understand what I mean – I want to feel more in control of my life, but still trying to discover what my life should be, or who I am.
Sorry to disappoint you with my lack of progress. I feel in control away from every other human being and away from my computer. But whenever I’m in front of a screen, I feel distracted from my own independent thinking, because what’s on the screen is easy to extract. Also I never feel in control in front of someone else. I feel like I want to please them instead of pleasing myself. That makes me sad too.
All in all, I still feel like so many external forces are controlling my life… I want to get done with my PhD thesis so that I can move on and find time to discover who I really am. But once I finish I have to think about how to stay away from where I come from (HK), as I don’t like that place at all – overcrowded, people just doing routine-rut jobs. Plus I need a job offer to stay where I am now (UK). And I need to sort out my VISA to do that. So it’s just like I can’t find time for anything else.
Going back to what I’m currently studying (Math) – I’ve always been good with it, but just wondering what impact I can make to this world with my pure brand of Math. And I’ve been finding that my subject is way too specialised. Yes, I do feel the sense of euphoria when I solve a Math problem. But that euphoria is not long-lasting at all.
From reading the NT Heirloom packages (particularly the 2nd one on Business Control), I really want to be one of these business self-leaders making millions. I just can’t see myself doing that in the closed academic circle doing very specialised pure Math research. In addition, I really find it hard to apply the mini-day schedule to my Math research. It’s like I have to spend most of the time power-thinking on Math problems instead of pouncing on little tasks (e.g. emails, phone calls, writing, etc).
I do have a little hobby which I’ve discovered about a year ago. I’ve seen films on the source of our foods, and the parts on where meat and dairy are produced really filled me with the desire to let more people know about the truths behind the foods that they take for granted. So I’ve been showing films on the benefits of a 100% plant-based diet where I am now (Bristol, UK). I really enjoy doing these outreach activities, esp. since my efforts instead of staying on sheets of paper alone actually have come alive in the real world and influenced lots of people.
So all in all, that’s my story. Would love to hear your comments and suggestions.